What I Want to Be When I Grow Up…..the View from 42!


The baby stage seems to be the easiest in this process of life.  There are no worries, nothing to stress over and you are pampered 24 hours a day.   As you know, the baby bubble at some point has to burst and the transformation starts to take place.  Growing, learning, developing, etc.  Yes, some of us adults wish we could stay in the baby form, but that is just not possible.

To not go through every step of the process, I will bring you to the teenage years and build from there.

As you go through school, learning and growing, educating your brain, etc., the time comes when you eventually start to think about what you will see yourself to be and the career path you will be following.  Sometimes, this decision is stressful.  Your mind is divided because you want to make your parents happy, but at the same time you want to educate yourself in a different arena.  Yes, parents love you and want the best for you, but they don’t always have the right answers.  The point is that you are different from them.  Okay, maybe some of the qualities are the same, but you are your own person.

The road that I was following during school was up and down.   I did not really apply myself as much as I should have due to the fact that I was not interested.  Not that I am blaming anyone but me.  To explain what I am referring to is that my mind-set was stuck in the freedom mode.  In the back of my mind, there was always that voice saying: ” what are you going to do with your life?”  Unfortunately, the front part of my brain took over and just did whatever I felt like that day.  Don’t misunderstand, my  grades were of the passing quality, but could have been higher if there was more focus on my part.

Okay, I graduated from High School, now what!  My dream at this point and time was to be a Fashion Designer.  The college I wanted to attend was in Maryland.  Well, as you know tuition out-of-state is more expensive.  My parents suggested that I attend what was known as Indian River Community College at that  time.  (Now it is a state college).  This is where the rebellion side took the lead, along with anger and frustration to follow.   Attitude because I was not getting my way!  (What a brat, right?)  (If any of you out there have kids, you know exactly what I mean).  So, the outcome of that whole situation was that I avoided going to college.  Some would say that I was stubborn.

The choice of not staying on the path lead to getting married at 18 and having a baby.  It seemed like I was not married at all because it ended quickly.  So, moving on to the next window of my life.  I am not going to detail the moments up until the present because there is not enough space and I don’t want to bore anyone.

So, coming into the present time of this 42-year-old life.  Even though the dream of Fashion Designer never panned out, my creativity has always been inside just waiting to blossom.  The short little journeys grow into amazing adventures.

The current avenue I am on is one of creating art from magazine paper.  A heart design made from rolled magazine paper and glued to a canvas that is either plain or painted to a person’s color preference.  Surrounding the heart are words that are hand written and are related to the heart like compassion, peace, love, sympathy, etc.  Designing these pieces brings a massive amount of joy and peace to my heart.

So, no I am not a professional______________, and no I don’t own a fancy  house or drive a flashy car, and that is okay.  I know who I am and life is flowing on the path  designed for me.

Everything that you encounter in your lifetime is a wonderful learning experience for what is to happen next.  Whatever comes your way, let it sink in and remember each moment is a stepping stone for your journey.

May you all have peace, love and happiness today!

Tammy

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6 thoughts on “What I Want to Be When I Grow Up…..the View from 42!

Peace, love, bliss kind reader

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